Why Celebrate Sensitivity? Part 2: The Highly Sensitive Person

A Review of High Sensory Processing Sensitivity

As you learned about in the first blog post of this series, high sensory processing sensitivity is a real physiological trait that research suggests a minority of approximately 20-30% of the population is born with. For simplicity's sake, we tend to refer to people with high sensory processing sensitivity as simply Highly Sensitive People, or, even more simply, HSPs. HSPs are most commonly described as having a more "finely tuned" nervous system than the rest of the population, making them take in and process at a deeper level their internal and external experiences. What's cool is that recent fMRI research is visibly showing that HSPs' nervous systems "light up" more in response to various stimuli, including pictures of people in happy or sad moods! That's lit.

So What Does That Even Mean?...

I'm glad you asked! It actually means a whole lot of things. Firstly, it means that 20-30% of the population is walking around with a nervous system that gives them a completely different lived experience than the rest of the population. Researchers see being highly sensitive as a neutral trait--not better or worse than the rest of the population, just different--that comes with its own unique challenges and advantages. So let's go through a few of those challenges and advantages, shall we?

Challenges

As you might guess, walking around with a finely tuned nervous system that spends extra energy deeply processing experiences can be a bit exhausting. Many HSPs, including myself, struggle with what is called ease of excitation and low sensory threshold. Basically what this means is that HSPs tend to be more quickly overwhelmed by stimuli and have a lower threshold for the amount of stimuli they can take in before feeling burdened or physically/emotionally unwell. I'll give some examples from my own life.

Over-Stimulation Challenges

Over-stimulation (sometimes called "ease of excitation" is when an HSP experiences a particularly strong emotional reaction to an internal or external stimulus. This means that experiences that some might find mundane innocuous, HSPs might experience as sharply uncomfortable, harsh, exciting, or overwhelming. As an example, I can remember in 1st Grade, I was talking with some other kids in class when I shouldn't have been (I was a very quiet kid and this was a rare occurrence for me). My lovely teacher simply said "Daniel, please quiet down, this is independent time" and my little highly sensitive heart sank. I wanted to cry. It felt as if I had been screamed at and reprimanded to the highest degree, when in hindsight, I know that my teacher literally just nicely asked me to quiet down. Whereas a non-HSP might hear the direction, take it in, quiet down, and then forget about it 2 minutes later, my highly tuned nervous system continued to process the interaction the rest of the day, playing close attention to my teacher's moods and interactions to make sure she wasn't disappointed in me. I've found in my practice that many HSPs can relate to that story!

Low Sensory Threshold can be another challenge for HSPs. HSPs tend to experience greater sensitivity to things like bright lights, loud noises, strong smells, and even things like medication and socializing. This can make even everyday environments sometimes a challenge for HSPs. Entering a new space could mean facing an artificial fragrance, fluorescent lighting, or booming music that will quickly leave an HSP feeling anxious or irritable. However, it seems that every HSP is a bit different in their sensory experience. For example, one HSP might really struggle with loud sounds while another might love blasting emotional music in their car, However that same HSP might really struggle with fluorescent lighting leaving them feeling drained or fatigued. It's a bit different for everyone!

Emotional Challenges

But, above all, the biggest challenge of being an HSP is constantly feeling misunderstood. Since HSPs make up a minority of the population, the general population has a difficult time "getting" why HSPs act and feel the way that they do. Many HSP childhoods are filled with adults telling them "you're just too sensitive" or "stop being so sensitive." Many HSP boys express difficulty making friends, because although the HSP trait is found in equal frequency in the sexes, boys are socialized from birth that sensitivity is weakness and weak is the worst possible thing you could be. However, as you'll read below, there are some great strengths that come with being an HSP, but society at large does not praise or celebrate these traits, and instead sends messages that competitiveness and dominance are better than gentleness and compassion. Something my blog attempts to dismantle!

Advantages

But being an HSP certainly isn't all bad, not even close. Although I've wished away my sensitivity MANY times, I truly wouldn't trade it in. Here's why:

Although HSPs are deeply affected by negative experiences (like being reprimanded by a teacher), we're equally as deeply affected by positive experiences! This is a concept called vantage sensitivity. It means that HSPs are particularly good at absorbing positive influences in their life. Studies show that HSPs are actually more responsive to therapy interventions than the general population. Additionally, in addition to the more difficult emotions, we also tend to experience feelings like love, excitement, joy, and connection more deeply. How cool is that?? Another central tenant of being an HSP is what is called Aesthetic Sensitivity. This means we tend to be more easily moved by artistic expression. Case in point: I've literally cried at each and every Pixar movie I've ever seen. Every. Single. One. Maybe this sounds like an awful way to live your life, but I love it! Nothing feels better than a good Pixar cry.

We also tend to have closer access to our empathy than others. We can pick up more easily on others' moods and feelings. When people express themselves to us, we listen. As a mental health counselor, I wouldn't trade this for the WORLD. I feel that my counseling skill is exponentially enhanced due to my high sensitivity. The feeling of connecting with others and being with them during difficult times is something I cherish, and while not all mental health professionals are HSPs, I'd venture to say that probably the majority of us are. While at times it can feel as if our empathy or listening skills are taken advantage of, with appropriate boundaries in place, increased empathy is something that every HSP can be truly proud of.

Finally, HSPs generally just have a different strategy going through life than the rest of the population. With deep processing of experience also comes deep reflection. Although there are some HSPs who are "high thrill seeking," most HSPs are more likely to pause and assess a situation prior to taking action. Some people might see this as a negative trait, but that's not true. Pausing and reflecting on experiences makes you more likely to fully understand the situation you're facing. You're less likely to make mistakes, and more likely to have a holistic view of how to best address a situation. All great qualities to have!

Conclusion

All of this adds up to being a skill set that that doesn't come as naturally to the rest of the population. A skill set that our world is in DESPERATE need of at the moment. The skills of empathy, compassion, gentleness, listening, and reflecting are all skills that come naturally to HSPs. Now. Don't confuse this to mean that HSPs are the ONLY ones who have these skills, or that ALL HSPs have these skills in spades. Because that's not how people work. HSPs aren't all lovely compassion angels sent from above, and the rest of the population isn't heartless competition addicts who eat HSP hearts for breakfast. But, what I am saying is that the skills of compassion, gentle leadership, empathy, and reflecting are something the world NEEDS, but something that many HSPs and others with these skills feel punished for expressing. But that's the topic of the next post!

I hope this post illuminated for you some of the challenges and advantages associated with being an HSP. I hope you come back to read the final part of the "Why Celebrate Sensitivity?" series where I'll explain why I think that celebrating and empowering sensitivity, gentleness, and compassion are something the world is in great need of, and how people with these traits can lead us to a safer, healthier, and more compassionate world.